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            Showing posts with label Negro Nonsense.
            Showing posts with label Negro Nonsense.

            Thursday, July 9, 2015

            Of DeAndre Jordan And Handshake Deals.

            , ask for their first born or mother (whichever's more valuable) as a retainer.
            DeAndre Jordan, after verbally agreeing to a four-year max deal with the Dallas Mavericks last week, has made an about-face, re-signing with the Los Angeles Clippers in a deal ESPN sources say was completed Thursday morning shortly after midnight ET at his house in Houston.

            The contract with the Clippers also is a four-year max deal that will be worth an estimated $88 million, sources told ESPN. Jordan can opt out after three years.

            A Clippers contingent that included coach/team president Doc Rivers, owner Steve Ballmer and star teammates Chris Paul and Blake Griffin descended en masse on Houston to get Jordan back, meeting him at his house.

            Several of the Clippers contingent remained after the end of the meeting, staying until he was to sign the deal, which the center was first able to do at 12:01 a.m. ET Thursday when a leaguewide moratorium was lifted.

            The meeting didn't last long, a source said. The group talked about the issues at hand, and then the atmosphere changed to resemble a locker-room scene, including cards and video games.

            Jordan did not respond to any of the Mavs' attempts to contact him Wednesday, including phone calls and text messages, and sources said Mavericks owner Mark Cuban resultingly notified several people within the organization that Jordan would be staying with the Clippers.
            Reality is, this is a free country北京体彩网官方网站 and the NBA's collective bargaining rules make Jordan's decision to return to LA perfectly legal. But everyone in this scenario looks bad, especially Jordan, who might want to hire extra security the next time he's in the Big D. Reneging on a contract, even a verbal one, is the worst way to do business, and if the NBA is smart it'll end it's silly free agency moratorium after this debacle.

            The move also shifts the balance of power in the West. With Jordan in Dallas, the net result is two mediocre teams. With Jordan as a Clipper, they've gotta be considered a Top 3 contender with Paul Pierce, Lance Stephenson and some of their other offseason moves. Dallas, on the other hand, is screwed. But hey, the rules (or lack thereof) are the rules.

            Adam Silver might need to fix this.

            Question: Was Jordan well within his rights to back out of the Dallas deal or does this set an awful precedence for the future? Have you ever weaseled your way out of a contract?

            Tuesday, March 3, 2015

            Somebody Take Steve Francis To Rehab, Please.

            Man, it's sad watching a person go from sugar to sh*t so publicly, and so swiftly. Former Maryland Terrapin and NBA All Star Steve Francis has seemingly been on a 24/7 bender since he got traded from the Rockets. Just when you thought things couldn't get any worse for homie, he got duffed onstage at a concert of some sort over the weekend.

            This isn't the first time Stevie Franchise got jumped in the club.

            Or did something downright head-scratching in the club.

            Seriously, Steve, just stay out the club. Bad things tend to happen to old guys there.

            All jokes aside, go to rehab, please Steve. Not that Rehab, real rehab.

            Wednesday, February 4, 2015

            Bad Assed Kids, George Jefferson Haircuts, And The Inherent Laziness Of Public Shame Parenting.

            As any one with sons will tell you, raising boys is hard. Not that raising girls is any easier[1], mind you. But boys present their own share of problems, the most persistent of which is behavior. My 8 and 6 year olds are a case study in this issue: they fight each other, don't clean up after themselves, are notoriously picky eater, and complain when asked to do something they don't want to. Despite all this, they do very well in school, and their teachers would probably be flabbergasted to know how differently they behave at 北京体彩网官方网站.

            Disciplining our sons is an ongoing struggle. My wife and I have tried every technique imaginable, from timeouts, to whippings, to the "Take Sh*t They Really Like Away For A Few Days" method. Some of this works for awhile, and then it's back to the usual "Boys Will Be Boys" tomfoolery. One thing we haven't tried is public shaming, which thanks to Black Twitter, seems to be all the rage nowadays. So much so that .
            Got a kid who’s raising hell? Afraid the police will be called if you break out the belt? A suburban Atlanta barbershop may have a solution for you.

            Three days a week, parents can take their misbehaving kids to A-1 Kutz and ask for the “Benjamin Button Special,” which Russell Fredrick and his team of barbers are offering — free of charge — to parents who want to try a novel form of discipline.

            The cut involves shaving hair off the child’s crown until he begins to resemble a balding senior citizen, inviting that unique brand of adolescent humiliation that can only come from teasing classmates and unwanted attention. Supporters say it’s the perfect punishment for misbehaving kids who want to “act grown.”

            Fredrick, the A-1 Kutz co-owner and a 34-year-old father of three, said he decided to advertise the cut after he used the unique disciplinary measure on his 12-year-old son, Rushawn, last fall — and saw immediate results. Rushawn’s grades, which had fallen, “dramatically skyrocketed” after he got his old-man haircut, Frederick said.

            Even so, he added, giving your child a haircut that makes them look like a mini-George Jefferson should be a last resort. The 10-year-old child in the photos he shared on social media had been brought to the barbershop by a single mother who told Fredrick she was looking for a way to teach her son a lesson after he misbehaved in school.

            One person who is willing to make a value judgement is Willie Jefferson Jr., a Houston father of two who shaved his 11-year-old son’s head after he misbehaved in class last fall. “I know what works for my children,” said Jefferson, who noted that he grew up in an “old school Mississippi family,” where corporal punishment was the norm. “When I spank, it corrects behavior. You may be able to talk to some kids; for others a spanking or an embarrassing haircut may be a great option.”

            Jefferson told The Post that the threat of public humiliation was so effective, his son is still on good behavior several months after he was given an old-man haircut. He noted that spanking or a humiliating haircut should be a last resort for parents, but an option nonetheless.

            “Shaming isn’t bad for children if it teaches respect,” he said. “It taught me respect, it taught my parents respect, it taught my grandparents and great grandparents respect, and that’s what I’m going to stick with.”
            When I first saw that kid's photo on Black Twitter, I thought "Damn, kids are going to the barbershop and asking for 'The Lebron James' now"? Sadly, there was much more to this photo than met the eye.

            I'm gonna keep it two hunned here: This is some ignorant assed sh*t. The parents who say this worked for them are not being truthful with themselves, and using this technique to excuse the fact that they've been generally sh*tty parents. You may see a temporary change in behavior, but I doubt the longterm results are going to be favorable.

            For kids, self esteem is everything. Expecting a 10 year old to endure ridicule from his peers, and learn some sort of lesson in the process is insane. That kid's probably going to be very resentful, and maybe even become more of an asshole as a result. And if a kid's acting out that badly and screwing up in school, it's most likely a symptom of some greater issue going on at 北京体彩网官方网站. This addresses none of that, it's the parenting equivalent of Fix-A-Flat. It'll work for a minute, but rely on it too much and you're gonna end up with an even bigger problem than you started out with. Or something like that.

            Sorry, I think this is terrible parenting. I'm sure I'm in the minority. I don't care. This is some bassackwards sh*t and it does not need to be glorified. Stop it already.

            Question: Is Public Shame Parenting a viable method for correcting your child's behavior?

            [1] My two year old daughter is... to put it lightly... a handful.

            Friday, January 16, 2015

            Why Can't Black Barbers Just Cut Your Hair The Way You Ask Them To?

            [Editor's Note: Yes, this is an old post. I'm rerunning it because this just happened to me (again) this morning and I'm super pissed. My hairline is crooked and it got pushed back to 1994. Just read it already, while I try and figure out how to "fix" this.]

            Something finally occurred to me the other day as I got out of the barber's chair. I hate strongly dislike barbers.

            I have only had roughly 4-5 people who cut my hair on a consistent basis in my short lifetime, and I eventually had a falling out with each and every one of them for the exact same reason: because they cut your hair the way they want it to look, not the way you ask for it.

            I have what is probably a moderately difficult head of hair to cut. I have what some older Black folks might refer to as "good" hair, which has always been the dumbest of statements to me. Isn't all hair good hair? Ask a balding dude if he'd rather have a "good" George Jefferson, or an "average" head of full hair. So enough of that nonsense.

            Anyways, since I do have "good hair", this also means it's hard for most novices to cut the right way because it grows in very odd directions, as well as in odd lengths (ie: shorter at the top, longer near the temples). Also, over the past couple of years, I've noticed some light thinning around my hairline, which only adds to the complexity.

            I usually stick with a barber who seems to figure out how to cut my hair correctly initially, but over time they all seem to revert to doing it "their way", regardless of what I ask for. So when I go in looking like a Wolfman and ask for "a little off the top and please don't push back my hairline!", then walk out looking like Kirk Franklin, you know something is wrong. These dudes are clearly just cutting it the way they want for the instant gratification and the praise of the other barbers when I step out the chair. They don't have to live with a pushed back hairline and a too-close for cold weather cut for the next couple of weeks. I do. And that kinda sucks.

            [Editor's Note: None of these haircuts look "bad", "gapped up" or even remotely "jacked up" by any stretch of the imagination. But none of them happen to be what I ask for, so it doesn't really matter.]

            Since I left my most recent barber a year or so ago[1] I've tried probably a half-dozen other barbers in search of someone who would just do what I asked them to. There was a girl who was cutting my hair for awhile that did a good job, but didn't do a great shape up, although she didn't push my sh*t back as I requested. There was a dude who cut pretty well, but then stopped showing up at the shop and answering text messages. Apparently he's taking a state-paid vacation in Jessup right now. And then, there's my current shop (and I use the word "current" loosely), owned by the Koreans. They, like everyone else, don't cut my hair the way I ask for, but the end result is usually not too bad looking, there's seldom a long wait (wonder why?), and the whole thing only costs $13, which in this economy is a steal.

            But again, why can't people just cut hair the way they're asked to?[2]

            To end on a positive note, I now present to you the greatest barbershop scene evar. Cop the headphones first.

            Question: Fellas, do you have a similar experience with barbers who cut your hair the way they want it to look, not how you ask? Ladies, I guess I could pose the same question to you, although it's a given that women's hair is a different animal in and of itself.

            [1] Yeah, that dude with the and the $22 cuts. I'll give him credit though, that soundtrack is still pretty tight. Listen to it. I guess that's why the cuts are so expensive. Somebody's gotta pay for all that flash animation and studio time.

            [2] And before you ask, no, I'm not about to start cutting my own hair. I don't have that sorta talent.

            Friday, December 5, 2014

            Brother & Sister Rob Auto Parts Store While Wearing Uniforms Of Competing Store.

            After more than two years, a Montgomery County woman was sentenced Thursday for a violent rash of armed robberies. She and two family members are facing serious time behind bars.

            The Montgomery County State's Attorney's Office says the crime spree was a family affair. A woman, her brother and cousin were sentenced for robbing three businesses and attacking the clerks and an 83-year-old customer.

            Surveillance video from one of the robberies shows the 83-year-old man violently being shoved to the ground. Then the suspect pushes a store clerk to the ground and puts a gun to his back.

            As the armed robbery proceeds, the suspect wearing a gas mask also points a gun at another employee and proceeds to bind his hands. In video from another connected robbery, two different suspects brazenly walk into a store with no masks.

            According to the state's attorney's office, that trio of bandits is actually a family of thieves. The last of the three was finally convicted more than two years after the crimes. The string of violent armed robberies happened in 2011 and 2012 at three Advance Auto Parts locations. In all, they made off with thousands of dollars in cash.

            Steven Williams was arrested because of surveillance video and evidence he left behind at the scene. “One of the guys that left the shirt at the scene had a dry cleaning tag that identified that particular uniform to him,” said Korionoff.

            And he confessed that his cousin, Terriet Williams, and sister, Wanda Battle, were his accomplices. But the case remained open because Battle got away and remained on the run until U.S. marshals caught up with her.

            The suspects were sentenced to ten, twelve and 15 years behind bars. It also turns out one of the suspects, Steven Williams, was a former employee of Advance Auto Parts.
            My wife and I watched this one the local news last night, and had to rewind and re-watch it about 30 times. Seriously, just hit play already.

            Let's count all the N-Word Nonsense in this 1:56 clip.
            1) Robbing a store with your sibling. #DaFam
            2) Robbing a store without a ski mask or anything to conceal your face.
            3) Can't convince a 83 year old man to Get Down or Lay Down.
            4) Can't even afford a real gas mask.
            5) Using a Halloween gas mask to conceal your face.
            6) Not realizing your face is already on the security cameras.
            7) See Number Two.
            8) Seriously, See Number Two again. Jesus Freakin' Christ, breh.
            9) How much you wanna bet Wanda got that mask off the AutoZone shelf?
            10) See Number Two again. #SMH
            11) Wait, is he riding that guy's back as he makes him open the safe?
            12) Wait, they had a cousin in on this scheme?
            13) This is the 3rd time these morons did this?
            14) They robbed the same damn franchise 3 times?
            15) Worst family mugshot off all time. Of. All. Time.
            16) This N-Word actually worked an AutoZone 10 miles away from the one he robbed?
            17) Hmmmmm... I wonder why he got fired? I'm gonna guess... he stole something.
            18) The reporter actually said "Major Fail"! Never change, Jackie Bensen.
            19) These dumbasses showed up for a robbery wearing matching uniforms... of a competitor?
            20) You leave a drycleaning ticket on the floor when you rob a store? Werd?
            21) The drycleaning ticket actually has your name on it?
            22) The 3 people who worked at the store during the robbery quit? No sh*t Sherlock.
            23) The detective and prosecutor look like they're trying their best not to laugh.
            24) This is why I love DC.
            25) This is also why I hate DC.
            Look, I'm not trying to make light of this. I worked at a grocery store and witnessed an armed robbery firsthand. It was probably the most terrifying 3 minutes of my entire life, and there's certainly nothing funny about a person waving a gun at you. Believe me, I know. That sh*t is not funny in any way.

            But seriously, these dummies really thought they could pull this off? Lock them up, discard the key. The world's a better place with them in captivity.

            Question: Are these the dumbest criminals you've ever seen?

            Thursday, October 30, 2014

            About That Bobby Shmurda Audition Video....

            If you haven't heard "Hot N*gga", don't know what the "Shmoney Dance" is, or generally have decent taste in music, you might wanna sit this one out. I don't have the time, energy, or inclination to describe the fleeting one-hit-wonder known as Bobby Shmurda. I just hope he, that weirdo who sings "Club Goin' Up On A Tuesday", and Trinidad James all have good financial handlers. Because they're all gonna be back to working the 3rd shift at Wendy's at some point, and the folks who pull up at the drive-thru are gonna have plenty of material to rag them about.

            Case in point.

            That, my friends, is what is often referred to as coonery. Apparently when he went to Epic to negotiate his record deal, Shmurda put on an impromptu concert with a medley of his biggest hits. And yeah, it was cringeworthy. Look at the white women in the first row. They look like they've just been street harassed at their Day Job. Look at the (smattering of) black folks. They look like "did I just spend $150k on an Columbia education to deal with this sh*t?"

            I could make a larger point about how indicative this is of the current state of hip-hop, but whatever. I'm more interested about how "behind closed doors" meetings somehow get recorded and go viral. What's up with that?

            Question: Does this make you sadder for Bobby Shmurda or the handful of "black record company execs" in the room?

            Tuesday, October 7, 2014

            Steve Harvey, Paula Deen, Racial Forgiveness, And Sold Souls.

            In an episode of the Steve Harvey Show set to air on Thursday, October 2, Paula Deen will speak with Harvey about what many might consider to be her surprising involvement with the Steve Harvey Mentoring Camp.

            The annual four day event, held in Dallas during Father’s Day weekend, was founded by Harvey to teach hundreds of fatherless young men about “personal responsibility, dream building and the importance of nutrition and physical fitness,” according to the organization’s official website.

            he 67 year-old Deen is slated to bring her famous Southern-style cuisine and talented team of chefs to Harvey’s mentoring program in an effort to help those boys who have an interest in the culinary arts. Harvey, in a recently released clip from the upcoming show, says that “Paula and her team has agreed to take as many boys as I want to fly down to Savannah [Georgia] … and teach them culinary skills. That, to me, is how you get something from something.” A one-time staple of the Food Network, a June 2013 controversy surrounding Deen’s admitted use of the “the N-word” in the past caused the channel to decline renewing her contract.

            In addition to the mentoring announcement, the interview with Harvey addresses the 2013 controversy, with the host saying, “I just know the good in her. That’s all I know. And it outweighs the bad by a landslide.” Acknowledging that there could be a backlash from critics and the blogosphere for working with a woman some might still consider a racist, Harvey also said, “Now, when you blog about me … can you please type, right after you get through typing, that I don’t give a damn. Just for me.”
            I don't give a damn, Steve. There, you asked for it.

            You really have to step back and admire Steve Harvey's hustle. I mean, think about this: this guy went from being the 3rd stringer on the King's Of Comedy Tour to a household name quicker than you can say "Bernie Mack died?" I don't know who his image consultant is, but I'd bet that person is bathing in 20 dollar bills. Rebranding Harvey, a man married more times that Zsa Zsa Gabor as a relationship guru was a stroke of genius. He's ridden that train to a couple of so-so rom coms, a daytime talk show, a national radio show, and a hosting gig for Family Feud. The man is everywhere, clearly because someone responsible for determining who gets to shine gave him the seal of approval.

            When I watch pure f*ckery like this Paul Deen interview, I wonder what strings came attached to that approval.

            This is not to say than Deen doesn't deserve a 2nd shot. This is America, a country北京体彩网官方网站 where people can drunkenly run over a man and play football the following year, or urinate on a teen and still have a career as a recording artist. So yeah, as long as she can make other people mounds of cash, she deserves another shot.

            I just don't know that Harvey needs to be the one giving it.

            Question: Is Steve Harvey "The Ultimate Hustler" or what? Should Rebb'n Al and Jesse be concerned about him stealing their racial forgiveness business?

            Raven Symone Wants You To Know She Isn't Black Anymore.

            I used to love watching That's So Raven. I don't know how much I like Raven Symone after this BS.

            I suppose I get what she was trying to say. I just don't really see the point in saying it. At all. You?

            Question: What's up with this chick?

            Monday, August 11, 2014

            Why I Can Only Get So Angry About The Ferguson Police Shooting.

            [Editor's Note: This is one of my infamous, un-spellchecked, stream of conscious rants. I hope you follow, I understand if you don't. Nothing here should be misconstrued as a lack of sympathy for the victim or his family. If you read it that way, then you may be missing the point. And if you're missing the point to such a wide degree, then please don't comment here.]

            Another young, unarmed black man was over the weekend, in what seems to be a summer full of such incidents.
            A city in the St. Louis metropolitan area has become incredibly tense after local police reportedly shot and killed an unarmed teenager on Saturday afternoon.

            18-year-old Michael Brown was fatally shot by Ferguson police officers during an encounter near the Canfield Green Apartments. According to KMOV, witnesses say Brown was unarmed and had his hands in the air when he was shot multiple times by an officer.

            Eyewitness, Piaget Crenshaw, 19, was waiting for a ride to work when she said she saw the police officer attempting to place Brown in the rear seat of a squad car.

            She then observed the teen, hands in the air, attempt to flee. Several shots were fired at Brown as he ran, Crenshaw said, striking him in the head and chest.

            Crenshaw said police asked and she complied with a request that she turn photos of the scene over to authorities.

            Dorian Johnson said he was walking with Brown in the middle of the street when a police car pulled up. The officer told the teens to use the sidewalk, according to Johnson.

            After an exchange of words, the officer shot Brown even after he raised his hands in the air, Johnson said.

            The officer “shot again, and once my friend felt that shot, he turned around and put his hands in the air,” Johnson told KMOV. “He started to get down and the officer still approached with his weapon drawn and fired several more shots.”

            Almost instantly, the scene of Brown’s death became ground zero for local outrage. Residents posted stark images from the scene to social media, including the below photo with the teenager’s corpse laying facedown in the street.

            The genesis of this was a physical confrontation,” Jon Belmar, chief of the St. Louis County Police Department, said at a Sunday news conference.

            The officer tried to leave his vehicle just before the shooting on Saturday afternoon, but Brown pushed him back into the car, “where he physically assaulted the police officer” and struggled over the officer’s weapon, Belmar said.

            A shot was fired inside the police car, and Brown was eventually shot about 35 feet away from the vehicle, Belmar said, adding few details because he didn’t want to “prejudice” the case.

            Police have not yet revealed what prompted the incident, but have confirmed that it was their officer who fired at Brown. Hundreds of local residents reportedly swarmed the scene, some chanting obscenities at the police.
            Having seen extensive coverage of the incident, I'm not buying the cops story here. This happened in broad daylight and in plain view of dozens, if not hundreds of people. They don't have any reason to lie. If they say the boy turned and had his hands up, then I'm going to believe them. It's not like dozens of black people had the time to congress and corroborate their story. So yeah, the cops shot this kid, even after he had turned and assumed the position. Nothing the police say, or do at this point will change the fact that they took a woman's child for no reason. They were wrong. Period. The cop who did this should face murder charges. Period.

            But I'm sorry if I can't get all that upset about this one. Yes, it's tragic that this boy was shot and killed. But come on, when I'm seeing ...
            Police in Prince George’s County say a 2-year-old girl was killed after being struck by gunfire.

            Police say they were called to the 6900 block of Forest Terrace in Landover, Md. on Sunday and discovered the child. The girl was taken to the hospital where she died. Police say there was a fight between two men at the residence and that one man left and returned to open fire.

            Police say the girl does not appear to have been the target and that they are searching for the suspect, who ran away after the shooting.
            A man was found shot to death inside a Prince George’s County 北京体彩网官方网站 early Thursday morning, and police have ruled it a homicide.

            Police were called to a 北京体彩网官方网站 in the 9900 block of Chessington Way in Mitchellville just after 5:30 a.m. for the report of gunshots. When officers arrived they found a man suffering from gunshot wounds. He was pronounced dead at the scene.

            Homicide detectives are at the scene investigating. Police say there is no threat to the community.
            A 30-year-old woman charged with fatally stabbing her mother in a Columbia Heights apartment told police that she may have been high on PCP during the attack, after which she tried to take her own life, according to an arrest affidavit filed in court Friday.

            The document says the suspect, Kieva Lynette Hooks, told a police detective that she had been arguing with her mother. She then broke down in tears and said, “I feel bad about what I did to my mom,” the affidavit says.

            Hooks was charged with second-degree murder while armed and ordered held until a preliminary hearing Aug. 11. The body of her mother, Tajuana Lynn Hooks, 54, was found Thursday morning on the floor, next to a couch, in a first-floor apartment in the 1300 block of Columbia Road NW.
            All of those incidents, involving black suspects and black victims, happened this week in the DC area. There were no protests. There was no Al Sharpton.[1] There was no call to action. No marches. No catchy hashtags. No Nancy Grace. Nothing.

            Those people's lives didn't matter to us, because the people who shot them look like us. Their murders were garden variety. Don't get me wrong, I fully understand the visceral reaction to incidents involving police shooting unarmed people, and the media attention that follows such incidents. That outrage is because power was misused by those who should be there to protect us. But bullets don't discriminate. Whether from a cop, an errant driveby, an intruder, or a daughter, the net result is the same. A person senselessly killed.

            So I'm sorry if I'm not pouring out tears for Michael Brown. And I don't say that with any trace of sarcasm. Not when I had a nephew murdered in broad daylight last summer and nobody cared enough to tell the cops who did it, even though they all know. I guess I've just gotten so desensitized to black murder that the circumstances which lead to it don't even phase me anymore. And that bothers me. I hope it bothers you, because the net result is the same. Death. Pointless death. One of these days, we, collectively, will get angry enough as a society to do something about this. I pray we will.

            On a completely unrelated note, what's up with this sh*t? Some negroes in Ferguson said "eff' a peaceful protest . Because Michael Brown would have wanted that.
            Protests over the slaying of a teenage boy reportedly turned violent on Sunday evening in the Missouri city of Ferguson.

            On Saturday afternoon a police officer shot and killed 18-year-old Michael Brown, who was unarmed at the time, setting off a wave of protests. Read our extensive coverage of the incident here.

            Portions of the crowds gathered for a vigil on Sunday have reportedly turned violent. Footage emerged on social media of crowds swarming a QuickTrip convenience store, looting and causing damage. The latest on-scene reports indicate the QuickTrip is now “burning,” and rioters have moved on to other local shops.

            KMOV-TV alleges that protestors also smashed out a window of their live news truck. According to multiple outlets, riot police have been called to the scene.
            Expressing your anger at the police shooting by looting a beauty supply store? Werd?

            The only thing standing between black people reaching our collective excellence is niggers like this.

            Question: What do you think? Why don't we as a collective community find black-on-black shootings as enraging? Is the media's tendency to trump up stories of black-on-white crime or police shootings while damn near ignoring black-on-black shootings a strange Grand Hu$tle that makes us feel like black life is without value? Have I turned into Black Bill O'Reilly or are you also outraged that you aren't more outraged about this latest police shooting? Why is there such a sense of nihilism in the black community regarding garden variety black-on-black crime?

            [1] BTW, I love Al Shapton, so there's no shots fired here.

            Friday, August 8, 2014

            Black People Are Not Monolithic.

            Okay, maybe some of us are...

            Monday, August 4, 2014

            The Most Literal Rap Video Shoot You'll Ever See.

            , The Man, or autotune for this. Personally, I blame Bobby Shmurda, but that's just me.
            Early Saturday morning, a music video shoot at a Bronx bodega turned violent after one member of a rap duo reportedly opened fire on his partner, wounding him in the head, legs, and chest. According to the bodega's owner, the shooting was triggered by an argument over who was the video's star.

            "They were fighting over who's the star, who's better," owner Ali Abdul told the New York Daily News. "They were drunk. They spit at each other then one guy pulled out a gun and shot the other guy five times."

            The gunman, who, as Gothamist notes, never lets go of his drink during the shooting, also repeatedly pistol whipped the 37-year-old victim. The video shows several witnesses casually stepping over the victim as he writhed on the floor in pain. The suspect remains at large; the victim is in critical condition at a local hospital and is expected to survive.
            Here's the video. Do not press play if you're faint of heart.

            Question: What the hell is wrong with these N-words?!?

            Wednesday, May 21, 2014

            Houston Man Sues Stripper To Get All His Singles Back.


            [Editor's Note: Uhhhh, am I the only one who got a distinctly manly "Tara From Sons Of Anarchy" vibe from "Nomi Mims"? Please tell me I'm not.]

            Seriously Mr. Wallace, just drop this lawsuit and move on with your life. Please.

            Question: Does this simp guy have a legitimate lawsuit? How does Nomi get her "booty and boobs back"?!? How long before this dispute is neatly resolved on a very special episode of Judge Mathis?

            Wednesday, May 7, 2014

            Do Black Athletes Ever Have Fathers?!?

            [Editor's Note: I am married. I have a daughter. I woman gave birth to me. I don't hate women. I don't hate single mothers. I don't hate women who have to go it alone because some man was too much of a b*tch to stick around and raise his own damn kids. This post isn't about any of that. It's about the media's obsession with perpetuating a stereotype of black men as absentee fathers. If you can't draw the distinction between the two, please close the browser right now because this is not the post for you.]

            Yesterday, Oklahoma City Thunder forward Kevin Durant accepted the NBA's Most Valuable Player Award and gave a very emotional speech about his mother. You may have already seen this, but if not, here goes.

            This was touching, I think any human being with a soul would concur. So was this poorly disguised Cadillac ad/tribute to his single mom by NFL QB prospect Teddy Bridegewater.

            And yeah, who can forget Lebron James tribute to his mom a couple of years ago?

            And of course, we spent the entire March Madness/April listening to the story of Shabazz Napier's mom, and seeing the camera cut to her every 4 seconds.

            Showing Napier, and showing his Mom happened with such alarming frequency during UConn's run to the national title that it damn near bordered on creepy. And it made me wonder: What exactly is the media's fascination with showing black athletes raised by single mothers?

            Is there some ulterior motive at play here? That level of adulation/obsession is seldom if ever displayed when black athletes have two parents, and it's darn near never given to white athletes, unless they happen to be the parents of a family of players (ie: The Zellers)[1].

            What the hell is up with that? Is the whole "Momma we made it!" angle just a shopworn journalistic shortcut? Or is there something more devious at play here? When 50% of black kids (which is granted, not an ideal number) are being raised in households with two parents (married or otherwise) it's hard for me to believe they can't find more examples of kids whose fathers[2] were actively involved and instrumental in their achievements.

            Here's where it really gets icky though (cue the angry comments!): I can't help but notice a serious double standard at play in all of these stories. Many (not all, but many) of the women in these stories had other children by other men (See the Bridgewater story) that they never married. These women are (rightfully!) hailed as saints who helped their children beat the odds and achieve their dreams, even if in some cases (ie: Lebron James' mother) those women weren't always present and had their own issues. It's hard for me to find any scenario in which a man who made poor judgement calls and had a sh*tload of kids by women he didn't commit to would be heralded in an equally favorable light. I've never, ever seen that. Not to get all Tommy Sotomayor on ya'll, but something about that double standard really, really rubs me the wrong way.

            Anyways, just wanted you guys thoughts on this admittedly convoluted and ultimately trival observation.

            Question: Does it seem as if the media promotes "raised by a single black mother" stories to advance some ulterior motive? Is that simply an easy journalistic trope, a reflection of where things are in society, or an underhanded way of advancing stereotypes about Black America?

            [1] The Currys would obviously be the exception here, but even in that case 90% of the media attention is given to the mother. Albeit for entirely different reasons.

            [2] The obvious exception: when the father was also an athlete. See also: The Currys, Glenn Robinson Jr, Tim Hardaway Jr. I almost see that as an equally shopworn journalistic shortcut.

            Monday, April 7, 2014

            Is Jay-Z A Five Percenter?!? Of Course Not.

            Black people are the fathers and mothers of civilization, white men are the devil, the Christian god is nothing more than a ghost and only a small percentage of people understand the world.

            These are just some of the ­beliefs behind the bling — the gaudy Five Percent Nation ­medallions worn by Jay Z and Carmelo Anthony.

            Last week, all eyes at the Barclays Center weren’t on Jay Z’s better half, Beyoncé — but on the coaster-size golden pendant swinging from the rapper’s neck as the couple sat courtside. Asked once if the group’s symbol — an eight-pointed star with the number 7 in the middle — held any meaning for him, the rapper shrugged, “A little bit.”

            So what exactly do Five Percenters believe?

            The rationale is that the black man is God and created the universe, and is physically stronger and intellectually stronger and more righteous naturally,” says Michael Muhammad Knight, an author of two books on the radical group.

            “Whiteness is weak and wicked and inferior — basically just an errant child who needs to be corrected.”

            Some followers take exception to those who transform their flag into a fashion accessory.

            “Jay Z is not an active member — no one has vouched for him” Saladin Allah, a representative of the group’s upstate region, told The Post. “It was always understood that you don’t wear the ­regalia if you don’t totally subscribe to the life.”
            This story should end with that last paragraph. Anyone with common sense and with at least one cousin who dabbled with all that God Body sh*t in the mid 90's should know Jay-Z is just wearing the necklace because it looks sorta cool (which it does) not because he thinks white folks are the devil. Not the very same white folks he sided with in the Barney's controversy last year. Or the same white folks he sided with to evict black tentants via eminent domain to build a basketball arena in Brooklyn. Or the same white folks he's siding with the sell everything from shoes, to headphones, to lousy watered down domestic beer. So yeah, enough of that dumb sh*t. Jay-Z only worships one master. Hint: it's colored green.

            But this being America and all, expect Conservatives to abandon the concept of critical thinking (and google) run with this one and somehow many it about Obama. Because America.

            Seriously, Jigga Man, take that dumb sh*t off.

            Monday, March 17, 2014

            Would You Publicly Whip Your Teenaged Daughter With A Belt For Twerking On Facebook?!?

            My daughter turns two in a couple of months. She looks and sounds every bit of 3 already. She speaks in full, intelligible sentences, is over the 100th percentile in height and weight, and already has perfected the art of selective listening. She's also cute as a button. So yes, I have sleepless nights wondering what this is all going to look like in about 11-12 years. Namely, how I'm going to juggle the typical father/tweenage daughter dynamic.[1] You still have to maintain some level of authority while allowing a girl to find herself. Push too hard and it's revolt city. Be too passive and she'll walk right over you. It's a precarious balance that some fathers ace, and others don't even bother to navigate.

            So when this video, courtesy of The Uppity Negro landed on my radar, I had to post it. And yeah, I already know. I'm scouring World Star Hip Hop for post fodder. It's that sorta day. Deal with it. Or Beal With It™. The video description says "Bad parenting or is this type of discipline acceptable now a days? Father disciplines his 13-year-old daughter after missing for 3 days messing around with boys & then posts all on facebook." and that's about all the context I have here.

            Warning: This video contains some very offensive imagery and isn't for the weak at heart.

            Well let's get one thing right out of the way: if you're going to publicly flog whip your child, you might want to check to make sure nobody has their i北京体彩网官方网站Phone out before you start whipping your child's ass in the Piney Courts Projects parking lot. So yeah, this guy is prolly going to jail for assault. Dumbass.

            Beyond that, it's clear this sperm donor.... errr, "father" has no authority or control over his daughter. And while it's certainly understandable that he's upset (clearly!) there were probably 1,928 other ways to process and relay his disappointment. And he chose the absolute worst option possible. Great judgement, buddy. Pull out next time.

            I won't add much more here, other than to say this man is wrong assed wrong, and that his daughter is prolly gonna be missing for a week "messing around with boys" next time, and might have a bun in the over upon return. Seriously, if you were that concerned, why didn't you call the cops and get them to issue an Aisha Amber alert? You know, like sensible concerned fathers do?

            Instead, this ass hat is headed to jail and his daughter is one step closer to the pole. #message

            Nice work, breh.

            Bonus: Since I'm already scraping the bottom on the internet barrel for material today, he's another example of Atrocious Black Parenting™ that I meant to post awhile back. This one's rather self-explanatory.[2]

            Question: Add your two cents to this senseless story.

            [1] Other than owning a firearm to ward of... err "vet" potential suitors.

            [2] Is it just me, or do SOME Black people not understand the concept of putting your phone in "landscape" mode instead of "portrait"? Just sayin'.

            Tuesday, March 4, 2014

            The NFL Wants To Ban The N-Word?!? N*gga Please.

            No need to rehash my feelings on the word nigger here. If you've read the blog long enough, you already know my stance. If not, get familiar. For those of you too lazy to do the 北京体彩网官方网站work, I find the word ignorant, try (and on occasions fail) to not use it, and think white people shouldn't say it under any circumstances. There. If you need more context, consult the link above.

            Anyways, with NFL, a league that seemingly has an image threatening issue going on all the time, is still smarting from the bad PR that resulted from the Richie Incognito/Johnathan Martin story last season. For those unaware, Incognito (who has since gone to the looney bin) threatened his then teammate with racial slurs (among other things) but says he did so because his other black teammates basically co-signed on the idea. I thought this was the worst kind of "well, they say it, so why can't I?" rationale for explaining away ones own shortcomings, but whatever. Reality is, the other black players in that lockeroom enabled Incognito, and they're every bit as much to blame as he is, at least for the racial epithets he peppered Martin with.

            The NFL conducted an independent investigation that basically determined Incognito was a psychopath (how appropriate) that Martin maybe shoulda stuck up for himself sooner, and that the Dolphins lockeroom, as well as other NFL lockerooms, needed to be a bit less toxic. So ?
            The NFL is throwing a flag on use of the N-word.

            In a groundbreaking move, the league is expected to agree to start penalizing players 15 yards for uttering the racial slur on the field, according to the group that monitors diversity in the league.

            John Wooten, chairman of the Fritz Pollard Alliance, said the rule will likely be adopted by the NFL competition committee at March’s owners meetings.

            “I will be totally shocked if the competition committee does not uphold us on what we’re trying to do,” Wooten said, according to CBSSports.com. “We want this word to be policed from the parking lot to the equipment room to the locker room.

            “Secretaries, PR people, whoever, we want it eliminated completely and want it policed everywhere.”

            Wooten expects the NFL to push for an automatic 15-yard penalty for first-time offenders. A second offense would result in an ejection.

            It’s hard to know how often the N-word is used on the field, but it was a prominent off-field issue for the league this season.

            The use of the slur by NFL players was thrust into the spotlight in late July when a video surfaced showing Eagles receiver Riley Cooper yelling the epithet at a concert.

            Just a few months later, it was part of the controversy in the Miami Dolphins locker room mess.

            The N-word was part of a barrage of bullying texts Richie Incognito hurled at Jonathan Martin. In one, Incognito referred to Martin, who is biracial, as a “half-n-----.”

            And then in November, an NFL game official was suspended for one game without pay after making “a profane and derogatory statement” to a Washington Redskins player during a game.

            Left tackle Trent Williams later said that the N-word was not among the vulgar language uttered by umpire Roy Ellison.

            But the incident prompted the Fritz Pollard Alliance to issue a statement imploring all NFL players to stop using the racial slur.
            I think this has to be the most misguided attempt at political correctness I've ever heard of, and I'm generally a guy who believes in political correctness. But this is simply treating the symptom, not the disease. Black players say the N-word so liberally because they've been mislead into thinking it's a term of endearment. White players say the N-word, either because they're racist as hell (see Riley Cooper and the aforementioned Incognito) or because they've also been mislead into thinking it's a term of endearment by black players who have allowed them to say it without any repercussions. Penalizing a team when a player utters this in the heat of play isn't going to "fix" players.

            How about educating them, all of them, on why the word is so ignorant, why it's hardly a term of endearment, and that it's just one of lots of words (f*ggot, r*tard, f*ckboi) they should eliminate from their vocabularies. And maybe they should ease up on all the pointless hazing and behave like grown assed men, instead of 9th graders. Not because it's best for the league's image (clearly the only thing that matters to the NFL) but because it's for their best as men.

            This N-word penalty tho? Nonsense. This will not work. At all.

            Roger Godell? N*gga Please.

            Question: Is this N-word ban going to work? Are there better ways of going about this if you simply want a more wholesome team environment?

            Wednesday, February 26, 2014

            Why "Urban" Radio Sucks.

            About 12-13 years ago, I abandoned black radio for good. By "black radio", I mean the terrestrial "Hot/Kiss/Power/Where Hip-Hop & R&B Live!" format that permenates the airwaves in every major US city. I still occasionally listen to "Adult Contemporary" radio (for the 35+ demo I'm in) when I don't have other options, but otherwise I'm listening to Sirius XM or my own music via Spotify or some other app. The reasons are many: repetitive playlists, corny "on-air personalities", and the "national show" trend that has made local stations somewhat obsolete. But mostly because of the music. It sucks, we all know that, and for years I've wondered why. Everyone has that artist they love whom they know would blow up if they just got more airplay. So why don't they get more airplay, when black radio can find time to play a Chris Brown song 8 times per hour.

            Here's why.

            I meant to post this awhile back. It's not a "new" video, since it's been out more than a year, but it explains precisely how black radio is programmed, and as a result, precisely why black radio sucks. If you're not familiar, New York's Hot97 is basically Black Radio's Flagship Station, and Ebro Darden is its Program Director, which is a nicer way of saying he's the guy that has to strike the balance between what listeners (presumably) want, and what makes the corporate entity that owns the station money. It's a precarious balance, and one that Mr. Darden seems to have a solid grasp on. Speaking with The Combat Jack Show's Reggie Osse, Dallas Penn (a friend of AB.com), and legendary producer Just Blaze, Darden explains exactly how records are chosen for airplay (hint: it involves advanced analytics and focus groups), why DJ's don't even really exist anymore, and (in a roundabout way) admits that this is why modern black radio is so awful.

            I admire Ebro's honesty here. He knows he's part of the problem, and doesn't shy away from admitting that. He also knows he couldn't "fix" the problem if he wants to keep his job. This is in 3 parts, and there's some light banter at times, but there's some serious knowledge on the radio and music industry being dropped here. If you've got time to digest it all (and I think you should, it's pretty fascinating stuff), I'd encourage you to.

            Question: Do you still listen to "black radio"? Was anything in these videos enlightening?

            Tuesday, February 11, 2014

            No. Michael Sam Is Not Rosa Parks.

            It's Black History Month, which is a nice way of saying it's time when those of us with kids have to do help them with school projects. My 5 year old had the task of creating a presentation on Rosa Parks, which means we've spent quite a bit of time learning about the civil rights pioneer. We even created a movie for the occasion. No, seriously.

            All together now... awwwwwww.

            Since Rosa Parks has been on my mind a lot the past few weeks as we've cut out photos, read library books, and scoured Youtube for kid-friendly videos (we made the one above, mostly because there aren't any. Not because it's the assigment). While there was quite a bit more orchestration (Parks was secretary of the Montgomery chapter of the NAACP and the chapter considered her a good candidate to take such a stand) behind Parks act of civil disobedience, it was still quite the act of courage for a 42 year old seamstress. She would be arrested for her sit-in, and even after the laws were changed following the ensuing 1 year boycott, Parks became completely unemployable, eventually fleeing to Michigan where she worked for Congressman John Conyers. In short, she took a potentially dangerous action, knowing that her life would likely never be the same as a result. That, my friends, is heroism and courage.

            , while courageous, is no Rosa Parks, as some who engage in hyperbole are saying of his decision to "come out" before the upcoming NFL draft.

            I applaud Sam's decision to "own the story" and announce his sexual orientation prior to the scouting combine. He takes an issue that was rumored off the table, and in an odd way, probably boosts his personal Q-Rating a million points in the process. I mean, has any other potential 3rd round linebacker prospect gotten shoutouts from the FLOTUS and POTUS? Nah. Sam could have talked around the issue when teams scout him, but by going public, he's making those interviews about little other than football. An openly gay player in the first media market is prolly gonna be in huge demand, sell a shitload of jerseys, and be the smiling, happy face of "NFL tolerance". Any teammate, opponent, or commentator who says anything sideways about Sam's sexual orientation is gonna get blasted, prolly making dude a Tim Tebow like folk hero in the process. I'm not saying this is a come up, but... well, it's a come up.

            What it's not is anything even remotely in the same stratosphere as Parks refusing to give up her seat, or Jackie Robinson breaking the MLB color barrier. Not even close. It's just a guy who happens to like guys, playing a sport with guys who like girls. Something that's probably been happening for years now, but ain't eeen know it. Word to Jason Collins.

            Not all "firsts" are equal folks. Enough already.

            Question: Is Sam the next Jackie Robinson, or merely the first gay linebacker that we actually know about?

            Marcus Smart Was Right.... And Wrong.

            [Editor's Note: yeah, I'm late. I already know.]

            Ok State point guard Marcus Smart has seen his fortunes go from sugar to sh*t faster than any black man not named Charles Ramsey. Last spring Smart was lauded for passing up the potetial of being the #1 overall pick in the NBA draft to return to college for another year of seasoning. NBA Analysts thought he was a fool, College Basketball purists thought he was living proof that some people value the college experience over a quick buck. As an NBA fan, I sided with the former: no matter how cool college is, you always strike when your stock is highest.

            Smart's season hasn't gone as planned. His team has underachieved, his game has regressed, and after this weekend's incident, his stock is likely in freefall.

            Personally, I was a bit shocked Smart got off with just a 3 game suspension. I was pretty damn sure he'd be kicked off the team, and wouldn't have objected if the school had done that. You can't just go around shoving boosters, no matter how obnoxious they might be. These are the rules. Of course, the school is in the business of making money, so, yeah... see you in 3 games, Marcus. Lay off the caffeiene while you're at it.

            All that said, the media's attention on Smart, versus the asshole fan who shouted whatever he shouted at him was pretty revealing. Are we really asking 19 year olds to put up with (probable possible)verbal abuse at the mouths of grown assed, presumably fully developed 60 year old fans? I sure hope not.

            What's really sickening is , Jeff Orr, didn't say anything that could have presumably set off the teenager, even going as far as to release a Zapruder film-level video of the incident.

            Whether or not Smart was called a nigger isn't the issue here. The issue is, why would a grown man call a 19 year old a piece of crap under any circumstances, let alone a basketball game? Any why is the burden of controlling ones emotions squarely on the shoulders of Smart? Does Orr think he can just hurl insults at a 6-4, 225 point man and not get his ass whipped? Would he do that anywhere other than from the sanctity of his expensive courtside seats? Would he say that to Smart if he ran into him at Target? I doubt it.

            While Texas Tech and Orr came to a PR-friendly resolution, Smart's facing an uphill battle to regain his footing with pro sports. Which is why he is ultimately the the person most wrong here. Because he had much more to lose than Orr, who didn't even lose his tickets.

            Keep your head up, Marcus Smart. And keep your mouth shut, Jeff Orr.

            Question: What's your read on this story? Where's the line between casual fan trash talk and verbal assault on a party that can't retaliate?

            Wednesday, February 5, 2014

            DMX To Box George Zimmerman, Avenge The Entire Black Race.

            Let's get ready to ... mumble. As in, what now, George Zimmerman?

            Seems like the former neighborhood watchman has found yet another way to remain in the public limelight.

            This time, he'll be stepping into a boxing ring to fight rapper DMX.

            Zimmerman said the celebrity boxing match was his idea. Boxing was his hobby, he told Radar Online last month, even prior to the "incident." The incident, of course, is the February 2012 encounter in which he shot dead an unarmed Trayvon Martin, 17. He stood trial for murder, but was acquitted.

            "Prior to the incident, I was actually going to the gym for weight loss and doing boxing-type training for weight loss," he told Radar. "A mutual friend put me in contact with Damon and provided me with an opportunity and motivation to get back in shape and continue with my weight loss goals and also be able to help a charity out."

            Damon is Damon Feldman, owner of Celebrity Boxing and self-described opportunist, whose claim to fame is putting together bizarre matchups. Think Tonya Harding, Michael Lohan.

            He said last week that he was accepting offers for someone to step into the ring for a three-round, pay-per-view fight with Zimmerman.

            "The news has been out for an hour and my e-mail is overloaded with 8,000 people wanting to fight George," Feldman told CNN on Thursday.
            So we've basically entrusted a damn crackhead with the task of exactly kharmic revenge on behalf of the entire race. Lovely, just lovely. Out of all the rappers we coulda chosen, we had to pick DMX? Really? A guy who's 150lbs soaking wet, which a history of mental problems is gonna beat a 200+ pound killer! guy with MMA training? Damn. Wasn't 50 Cent available? He was once a boxer, and he raps (sometimes). He's probably too rich to care. So how about real rap tough guys like Bumpy Knuckles, Trick Trick, and The Game. They've got plenty of free time on their hands, and Game even has a (somewhat puzzling) Trayvon Martin tattoo. Heck, he was even mistaken for Martin by internet race baiters some. . Why not Jayceon?

            Anyways because Zimmerman hand-picked his opponent, we're stuck with DMX now. And as tough as he might come across, I thinking most of that is macho-posturing and heroin. Mostly the heroin. Need I remind you what happened the last time a macho-posturing rapper stepped into the ring?

            Yeah, this could get ugly. Real ugly.

            Keep your nose clean, and drink lots of raw eggs, X. The entire race is depending on you.

            Question: Is DMX gonna get his clock cleaned by George Zimmerman? What will it mean for Black America when/if he does? Could you think of another rapper who might have been better equipped to handle this?