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            Showing posts with label Go Sit Down.
            Showing posts with label Go Sit Down.

            Monday, May 11, 2015

            Nancy Gordeuk, TNT Academy, And Should Racist People Lose Their Jobs?!?

            , assuming you weren't under a rock or too consumed with NBA buzzer beaters this weekend.[1]
            A high school graduation in Georgia turned bizarre Friday night when the school’s founder and principal accused African-American attendees of disrupting the program that she had flubbed herself.

            Nancy Gordeuk, of the nontraditional TNT Academy in Atlanta suburb Stone Mountain, blurted out, “Look who’s leaving — all the black people” to the stunned audience at a local church, two videos of the incident show.

            The graduation had fallen off track when Gordeuk somehow forgot to call on the school’s valedictorian to speak and then attempted to call the room back to order when alerted to her mistake at the end of the bumpy ceremony, WAFB-TV reported.

            You people are being so rude to not listen to his speech,” she tells the audience in the footage. “It’s my fault that we missed it in the program.” She adds: “Looks who’s leaving — all the black people.”

            The entire audience gets up and leaves after the educator’s rant devolves into the race-based accusation.

            Gordeuk apologized in a TV interview the following day and claimed the video had been taken out of context. But longer footage of the incident recorded in a different section of the audience shows her calling a man who was filming with his tablet a “goober” and a “coward” and challenging him to identify himself.
            Here's the video. I'm not gonna lie, at first I thought this was a Lisa Lampanelli standup routine gone viral, but then googled the school and found out TNT Academy is an actual real life thing and holy sh*t, this woman's in charge of an actual real life school!!!!

            So far, the response over the internets has been predictable. A lot of people think this woman is a best uncouth, and at worst, blatantly racist to single out black people for leaving early when clearly there are lots of people of all races leaving. Others are siding with Mrs. Gordeuk, asserting that she was merely calling attention to the race of the majority of those leaving, and besides, "if blacks didn't loot and riot in Baltimore nobody would say such things in the first place" and "if only you people stopped killing each other and pulled up your pants and quit voting for Democrats all the time".

            Gordeuk, in a strange sequence of events, initially (!!!) for her momentary racism before settling on the "goobers" in the audience who brought the "racist comment" (her words) out of her mouth.

            Here's the thing my parents always taught me: Nobody can bring anything out of you that's not already in there. Nobody.

            I find it quite hard to believe that this was the first time Gordeuk done anything suspect, and many of those in attendance at the graduation seems to echo that sentiment. Since she's technically the founder of the school, it's unlikely she's be fired, but she might just need to fall on the sword anyway since whatever government funding her school gets is inevitably gonna be pulled after this. And props to parents of all races for getting up and leaving after this classless and offensive display.

            Seriously, America, grow up already.

            Question: Does this lady deserve to be fired? Was her statement racist, or just racial?!?

            [1] Seriously, three days, three buzzer beating game winners. In what other sport does this occur?

            Chris Christie Literally Just Ate Away His White House Aspirations.

            No need to lie: I've gone on record repeatedly saying that (pre-BridgeGate) Chris Christie was a guy I'd at least remotely consider voting for in 2016. I'm no Hilary fan (at all) and a moderate Conservative like Christie seemed like a viable alternative at one point. Of course, his past two years have gone about as well as the New York Jets past two years have, with one controversy after the next. Big C.R.I.S. has essentially been lapped by contemporaries like Jeb Bush and Scott Walker, and it seemed unlikely that he would even throw his hat in the ring.

            Correction: .
            New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie (R) spent more than $82,000 in taxpayer money on concessions at NFL games -- a sum that Republicans later reimbursed to the state Treasury to avoid impropriety.

            According to a New Jersey Watchdog analysis of records from the governor's office that was published Monday, Christie used $300,000 of his $360,000 state allowance over five years to purchase food, alcohol and desserts. Some $82,594 of that sum went to Delaware North Sportservice, which operates the concessions at MetLife Stadium, the 北京体彩网官方网站 of both the New York Giants and Jets teams.

            To avoid a potential scandal that could embarrass their rising political star, the New Jersey Republican State Committee reimbursed the Treasury in March 2012 for Christie’s purchases from “DNS Sports.” Since then, the governor has refrained from using his expense account at MetLife and other sports venues.
            According to the analysis, Christie was also a big fan of the grocery store Wegmans Food Markets, where he spent $76,373 in 53 shopping runs. A spokesman for the governor defended the nature of the expenses, explaining they were for "official" and "business" purposes.
            The punchlines sorta write themselves here. I guy who's battled weight problems his entire life gets undone by, what else, food? How fitting. It's also sorta ironic that a guy who railed against teacher pensions to the point of bullying has wasted money in the most wasteful way possible: his gullet. And at a stadium for a team he doesn't even like (he's a noted Cowboys fan, which is just all kinda of stupid).

            $82,594 on snacks? What the hell was he eating, gold-plated nachos?

            Have a seat, buddy. Actually, make that two.

            Question: Does the lack of a moderate conservative to balance out Hillary concern you at all? Would you have considered voting for this guy under any circumstances? What's his next career move?

            Wednesday, October 29, 2014

            Is There A Fine Line Between "Street Harassment" And Innocent Compliments?

            I'm just gonna toss this one out there, as a social experiment. Because it's trending and because I'm interested in knowing what you guys see here. But mostly because the video is trending. Anyways, watch the whole thing first, then weigh in below.

            Question: Was the woman being harassed or complimented? Ladies, have you experienced such treatment?

            Tuesday, October 7, 2014

            Steve Harvey, Paula Deen, Racial Forgiveness, And Sold Souls.

            In an episode of the Steve Harvey Show set to air on Thursday, October 2, Paula Deen will speak with Harvey about what many might consider to be her surprising involvement with the Steve Harvey Mentoring Camp.

            The annual four day event, held in Dallas during Father’s Day weekend, was founded by Harvey to teach hundreds of fatherless young men about “personal responsibility, dream building and the importance of nutrition and physical fitness,” according to the organization’s official website.

            he 67 year-old Deen is slated to bring her famous Southern-style cuisine and talented team of chefs to Harvey’s mentoring program in an effort to help those boys who have an interest in the culinary arts. Harvey, in a recently released clip from the upcoming show, says that “Paula and her team has agreed to take as many boys as I want to fly down to Savannah [Georgia] … and teach them culinary skills. That, to me, is how you get something from something.” A one-time staple of the Food Network, a June 2013 controversy surrounding Deen’s admitted use of the “the N-word” in the past caused the channel to decline renewing her contract.

            In addition to the mentoring announcement, the interview with Harvey addresses the 2013 controversy, with the host saying, “I just know the good in her. That’s all I know. And it outweighs the bad by a landslide.” Acknowledging that there could be a backlash from critics and the blogosphere for working with a woman some might still consider a racist, Harvey also said, “Now, when you blog about me … can you please type, right after you get through typing, that I don’t give a damn. Just for me.”
            I don't give a damn, Steve. There, you asked for it.

            You really have to step back and admire Steve Harvey's hustle. I mean, think about this: this guy went from being the 3rd stringer on the King's Of Comedy Tour to a household name quicker than you can say "Bernie Mack died?" I don't know who his image consultant is, but I'd bet that person is bathing in 20 dollar bills. Rebranding Harvey, a man married more times that Zsa Zsa Gabor as a relationship guru was a stroke of genius. He's ridden that train to a couple of so-so rom coms, a daytime talk show, a national radio show, and a hosting gig for Family Feud. The man is everywhere, clearly because someone responsible for determining who gets to shine gave him the seal of approval.

            When I watch pure f*ckery like this Paul Deen interview, I wonder what strings came attached to that approval.

            This is not to say than Deen doesn't deserve a 2nd shot. This is America, a country北京体彩网官方网站 where people can drunkenly run over a man and play football the following year, or urinate on a teen and still have a career as a recording artist. So yeah, as long as she can make other people mounds of cash, she deserves another shot.

            I just don't know that Harvey needs to be the one giving it.

            Question: Is Steve Harvey "The Ultimate Hustler" or what? Should Rebb'n Al and Jesse be concerned about him stealing their racial forgiveness business?

            Raven Symone Wants You To Know She Isn't Black Anymore.

            I used to love watching That's So Raven. I don't know how much I like Raven Symone after this BS.

            I suppose I get what she was trying to say. I just don't really see the point in saying it. At all. You?

            Question: What's up with this chick?

            Monday, July 28, 2014

            Someone Actually Thought This Was A Good Idea...

            We have Verizon FIOS at 北京体彩网官方网站, and everytime I venture into the hinterlands of my onscreen guide (aka: The Non-HD Channels) I find a new station I'd never heard of before. There's Chiller, a channel that presumably shows horror movies. There's something called Blue Ocean Network that's in some language I don't understand. There's BYUTv, presumably for people who want to watch Jimmer Fredette highlights all day.

            It seems like there's a channel for every possible niche. So yeah, I suppose this would fit someone's niche. I'm just not sure whom that someone is...

            Actually, I do. People bought this woman's books and still pay a pretty penny to see her babble word salad in person. So yeah, someone will be forking over $10/month. Not me, but someone.

            Question: What's the dumbest, most pointless channel you've got on your cable box? If you have HD, do you also find it impossible to watch standard definition channels?

            Wednesday, June 11, 2014

            Halle Berry Owes $16K/Month In Child Support. Stevie J Is $1M In Arrears.

            As a guy married for nearly 13 years, I can tell you marriage is work. Mix in kids, and it damn near becomes a 2nd day job, albeit one with great benefits. The adage goes "it's cheaper to keep her", which is a nice way of telling men they're better off staying married than getting divorced and being forced to live in a van down by the river. Not that I need reminding, because I have plenty of family and friends who have had their futures wrecked by the dreaded combination of divorce and spousal support. Of course, you should contribute to the financial wellbeing of your kids, but what's a reasonable price?

            are on separate ends of a dreaded court order, and I'm wondering if how people are judging both is due to the gender of the person involved.
            Halle Berry has a hefty new expense. The Oscar-winning actress has to pay over $16,000 in child support each month to her ex, Gabriel Aubry, to provide for their 6-year-old daughter Nahla, the Los Angeles Superior Court ordered.

            Berry's monthly bill will remain in effect until Nahla turns 19 or graduates high school, whichever occurs first, according to court documents obtained by CNN. The settlement came on May 30, at the end of lengthy child support legal battle.

            The court also ordered Berry to pay $115,000 retroactively in child support, as well as to cover her ex-boyfriend's legal fees, which amount to $300,000. The "X-Men: Days of Future Past" star is fully responsible for Nahla's tuition, while both parents will divide health care costs.
            In the words of that sage American hero Jax Teller, JESUS CHRIST!!!!

            Not to be outdone, "reality TV star" Steebie . Yes, even more heinous than acting like a moron on TV and marrying Joseline.
            Reality-TV star and onetime hit producer Stevie J has been arrested after racking up what TMZ reports is a "million-dollar child support debt." According to the gossip site, the Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta star is currently in jail after he allegedly stopped paying a court-ordered $8,500 monthly child support payment in 2001.

            According to a criminal complaint seen by TMZ, Stevie J fathered two children with his then live-in girlfriend in 1997 and 1998 and was initially ordered to pay $6,500 in child support in 1999. That amount was raised to $8,500 a few years later.

            TMZ reports that Stevie J hasn't paid child support in some 13 years, bringing his estimated total back child support owed to $1,107,412!
            Breh, how can you not pay child support for 13 years? How is that even possible, and why exactly is the children's mother (how old are these kids by now, 25?) just now trying to collect?

            My theory is pretty simple: this guy probably had an agreement with the child's mother to give her whatever he could, off the grid, and she agreed. Years later, he's on reality to flossin' like he's a millionaire and she decides she wants a chunk. Turns out that chunk is well over a million dollars for two damn kids. Amazing.

            I've heard it said before, and it bears repeating: if you've ever in such a position, establish child support via the courts immediately and pay. Under the table support doesn't count in the system, and should the recipient decide your under the table arrangement isn't sufficient, she can file and recieve money retroactively, which wouldn't take into account any of what you've already paid. Or if you're in Stevie's case and suddenly go from making Bad Boy money to No Money Mo Problems money, lawyer up, go to court and get your monthly obligation modified downward. Any black man who has spent hours of his formative years in a black barbershop would know this, as well as a million and one other legal tidbits. Life hacks, my arse.

            As for Berry, well damn. $16k a month to a guy we weren't ever married to is bad enough, but I'm also wondering how she managed to lose custody in the first place. 9 times out of 10, the courts will deem the mother the optimal parent for a child unless she has some serious mental/substance abuse issues. I don't know much about Berry, but jeez, with the money she has, she must be really screwed up if the courts gave her daughter to the kid's father.

            Either way, let this be a lesson for everyone: pull out!

            Question: Thoughts? Opinions? Got a gruesome child support story of your own you wanna share?

            Thursday, June 5, 2014

            Janelle Ambrosia And The Slut Shaming Of Internet Racists.

            I prefer my racism blatant, not disguised or covert. I'm 40 years old now, so it's a lot easier to have someone make it quite clear where they stand as opposed to me having to guess. I'm just black lazy like that. Because blackness.

            With that said, there are varying degrees of racism. An idiot telling me I'm must be hot because I'm a black man driving a black car on a summer day ranks around a .05 on the 10 point racism scale. An idiot realtor telling me he's not going to show me and my wife 北京体彩网官方网站s in a certain neighborhood because he "doesn't think it would be a good cultural fit" ranks about a 3. Police pulling me over in broad daylight with all 4 windows down because my "tint was sorta dark", although said window tint is factory issued ranks around a 6.

            It's levels to this sh*t.

            A video that is lighting up the internets (namely Black Twitter) right now, displays some seriously , but in the grand scheme of things, it's still only about a 2.
            Janelle Ambrosia, the woman captured in a YouTube video going on a racist tirade in western New York this weekend, told WBLK host Big Rob Wednesday morning that her comments had been prompted when the man she was yelling at had almost hit her child with his car. Ambrosia swore she was not a racist, but was bipolar, and that her ex was attempting to use the video to obtain custody of her children.

            “I’m not a racist, I have a black cousin,” Ambrosia said, adding that the man had called her a “Crackheaded cracker” before the video.

            Big Rob asked how the word “nigger” entered the equation.

            “Quite frankly, if you look it up, nigger means an ignorant person,” she replied. “It has nothing to do with race. But it’s okay for him to call me a racist or honky. That’s racist.”

            “I’m really not a racist, I was just pissed off,” she said. “If he didn’t try to almost hit my kids, none of this would have happened.” She declined a chance to apologize.

            There’s still a chance this is some crazy improv group, but it’s diminishing.
            Here's the original video that has landed the woman in serious trouble.

            Here's her appearance on a local radio show, after which she undermined herself by going on Twitter and acting a complete ass.

            I'm sure I'm gonna piss a lot of ya'll off here, but I'm gonna play the blame the victim card. Yes, this woman is a racist jackass. Yes, she was out of line for calling this man a n*gger for merely having the nerve to start his car. Yes, it's deeply concerning that a woman with some very obvious drug problems is responsible for rearing kids. Yes to all of that.

            But come on, what's with the brother filming this sh*t? You're at a Dollar General store. The lady's an asshole. What's the point in filming this, putting the video on Youtube, and now putting the woman in danger of losing her job as a stripper and custody of her kids? What does that actually accomplish? Does it make her less racist (judging by her Twitter stream, no)? Does it free the kids of this sort of malicious influence (unlikely, given the fact that their Dad's prolly worse)? Does it mean she won't be able to give lapdances to drunken patrons while "Thunderstruck" plays in the background (also unlikely. Because strippers)?

            No, it just means the internets gets to slut shame another dumb person into a slightly more depressing state of being, while patting itself on the back for "calling out racism". It's a lot easier to point the fingers at an ignorant, powerless woman than it is to call out politicians, media personalities, law enforcement officers, and business owners who are bit more artful with their ignorance, yet have far more power to impact the damage on the lives of those whom they harbor racial bias against.

            So yeah, let's all just gang up on the N-word spouting, meth addicted, bipolar stripper. Because that's low hanging fruit, and it tastes so much better.

            Question: Assuming you're familiar with this story, what's your read on it? Is all racism equal, or are there indeed levels to this sh*t?

            Wednesday, May 21, 2014

            Houston Man Sues Stripper To Get All His Singles Back.


            [Editor's Note: Uhhhh, am I the only one who got a distinctly manly "Tara From Sons Of Anarchy" vibe from "Nomi Mims"? Please tell me I'm not.]

            Seriously Mr. Wallace, just drop this lawsuit and move on with your life. Please.

            Question: Does this simp guy have a legitimate lawsuit? How does Nomi get her "booty and boobs back"?!? How long before this dispute is neatly resolved on a very special episode of Judge Mathis?

            Tuesday, March 18, 2014

            Disillusioned Obama Supporter Hilariously Burns T-Shirt In Protest.

            "Youth is wasted on the young". It's an adage that's typically blabbed by over the hill guys like me, but it's not without validity. When you're young, you have outlandishly idealistic ideas about how the world should operate, and scant experience in how it actually does. The "hope" hasn't been drained from you yet, which is in fact a lovely thing. Because seriously, no 20 year old should already feel that all things aren't possible. It's pretty sad to see people who've already quit being optimistic at an age when the world should be your proverbial oyster.

            Which is why I can't watch this video and do anything other than laugh.

            Well isn't that cute? Little Carey Wedler is disappointed that a politician actually turned out to be a politician, and not some Magical Negro who would live up to her every hope and dream. Pour out a lil' of your $7 latte and bemoan the day when this poor girl realized there was no Santa Claus.

            Much like Knicks fans salivating over today's arrival of Phil Jackson[1], someone should have sat Ms. Wedler down in 2007 and explained the harsh reality of headed her way. But that would have been cruel. She had to learn the hard way, I suppose.

            Question: What did you think of this young lady's self-serving public denouncement of her support for Obama? Did the GOP just gain a new voter or did this girl finally realize there's no Tooth Fairy?

            [1] Trust me Knicks fans, this will get waaaay uglier before it gets prettier. It has to if it's going to actually work. And given the scores of other "saviors" that arrived at MSG and left without guiding the franchise to the promised land, I'm thinking this ends badly. No disrespect to Phil Jackson, of course, but still...

            Thursday, December 12, 2013

            What If Santa Claus (And Jesus) Was Black?!?

            I don't even know how to adequately describe this idiocy, courtesy of (who else?) Fox News. There's whitewashing, and then there's WHITEWASHING!!!! For people who profess to know everything about the Bible, you'd think they'd have a slightly better understanding of what the bible actually says about Jesus' appearance, and how the predominant image of Jesus we all have accepted as "Jesus" came into existence.

            Eff' a Santa Claus. We know that was based on St. Nick and whatnot. I'm not nearly as concerned about that.

            Whatever, why try to make sense of nonsense. "Jesus JUST IS WHITE", says Megyn Kelly. And Megyn Kelly has a law degree and sits in a leg chair. Take her word as the proverbial gospel. Or don't. Whatever.

            Question: What are your thoughts on this? Amateur theologians, here's your time to shine. Go for it.

            Friday, October 11, 2013

            Truckers Against Obama: Perhaps The Dumbest Tea Party Protest, Yet.

            I don't take the Capital Beltway to work, but I once did. Until we moved deeper into the burbs a few years ago, I wasted hours and hours of my life sitting still, wondering where it all went wrong. After we moved, my commute was slashed to 1/4 of it's prior duration. And the subtracted stress of "people who can't drive!" added a few years to my life, I'm certain.

            For those of you only vaguely familiar with DC traffic, I-495's reputation is well earned. , according to smart people responsible for gauging this sorta stuff. After "the sports teams suck" and "the houses are too damn expensive", it's my biggest qualm about the DC Urreah, an otherwise splendid place to call 北京体彩网官方网站.

            I say all of that to say I'm happy I'm not on the Beltway today, because .
            No major traffic delays were reported on the Beltway during Friday’s morning commute, police authorities said, despite a protest by about 30 tractor-trailers and pickup trucks against what organize describe as excessive government intrusion.

            Around 8:30 a.m., police said, the trucks crossed into Maryland from Virginia on the Beltway. They were were traveling in the right lane of the Beltway at the rate of the rest of the traffic — around 40 to 45 miles per hour, due to the wet road conditions, according to Virginia State Police spokesman Corinne N. Geller.

            At one point, four tractor-trailers started driving side-by-side, across all four northbound lanes of the inner loop. That caused traffic to slow to 15 miles per hour. State police troopers stopped the vehicles and “warned them not to impede traffic,” Geller said. The drivers were not issued tickets and allowed to “proceed on their way.”

            There were no other major incidents reported as a result of the truck protests, she said. Minor delays were reported near the truckers at Route 236 in Annandale at the Braddock Road exit on the inner loop, but it was unclear from traffic cameras if the slowdown was due to the truckers.

            On parts of the Beltway, police said the group stood out because they had American flags draped on their vehicles, along with signs that said “#T2SDA” (Truckers to Shut Down America).

            Geller said the organizers of the protest, dubbed “Truckers Ride for the Constitution,” plan to take shifts and drive around the Beltway throughout Columbus Day holiday weekend. Extra troopers are on the road because of the expected uptick in holiday drivers, and because of the protest, she said.

            The protest group’s agenda has evolved since the story began making the rounds of news outlets early this week, with a story in U.S. News & World Report that said some truckers wanted members of Congress arrested, while others called for the ouster of President Obama.

            Andrews said the group still wants to get rid of Obama, but will do so by legal means. She said independent truckers also are upset about new regulations, including on idling and hours of service, that, she said, threaten to put them out of business.
            If you Teabaggers understood "irony", you'd grasp a few cold, hard facts:

            1) You're protesting Obama (and Congress... sure, okay) but he lives nowhere near the Beltway, and he doesn't drive either. So not only isn't he being inconvenienced by your "protest", but it's also possible he doesn't even know you nimrods exist.

            2) I doubt any Congressman is actually hurt by your traffic jam, since many of them live inside the Beltway, or have drivers. BTW, most of them were prolly already at work well before your little stunt began.

            3) You're not hurting the people who (allegedly) are tyrannically oppressing you. You're hurting taxpaying, hardworking "Real Americans" who just want to get to the jobs they're still lucky to have, to pay for houses they're still lucky to afford.

            4) You're protesting government tyranny, but make your living on roads maintained by the government.

            Get your dumb asses off the Beltway, and go deliver some freight. Assholes.

            This is literally and figuratively .

            Question: Am I being too hard on these fine "Real Americans" who just want to exercise their right to free speech? Will this protest have any lasting effects?

            Monday, August 26, 2013

            Would You Twerk To Pay Your Tuition?!?

            My daugher is now 15 months old, and she is truly the apple of daddy's eye. She can do no wrong. No. Wrong. She craps rainbows and her eye boogers prolly taste like Skittles. She is the world's cutest baby by a wiiide margin, and that's not even up for debate. She's a baaadd girl.[1]

            Last night, for the first time, she escaped the crib, which in some odd way let me know she's not a baby anymore. She also talks, sings along the the medley of her favorite Nick Jr. shows, and of yeah, she dances. Anytime music of any sort (gospel, children's music, techno, lullabies) my child immediately starts gyrating up and down. It's a really innocent thing, of course, and the subject of hours of entertainment for our entire family.

            And now, in the most awkward segue of all time (don't worry, I'll tie this all together), I present to you, .
            Who says twerking doesn't pay? Yesterday, Juicy J promised tuition money for the best female twerk champions, tweeting, "im giving out a 50k scholarships to the best chik that can twerk.”

            However, he didn't give up any other details, which means the post could've been a prank or a publicity stunt promoting Stay Trippy, which includes a track called "Scholarships." If the former is true, not everyone in the Twitterverse laughed it off. "Juicy J is giving away a scholarship to the girl who sends in the best twerk video? And my hope for human race is OFFICIALLY gone…," tweeted user @DanaLynn03.

            Others were more than willing to twerk it for college funds and a bunch refused to believe the story all together.

            Juicy eventually deleted the tweets but kept up those regarding Stay Trippy, out next Tuesday (Aug. 27). The release, his first on Wiz Khalifa's Taylor Gang imprint, features A$AP Rocky, Chris Brown, Justin Timberlake, Big Sean, Trina and more.
            Okay, where do I begin here?

            1) While I'm happy that Juicy J has somehow managed to re-invent himself and milk his Grammy win, adding another 3-4 years to his career, I can't help but wonder why a 40 year old man thinks this is a good idea. Does he not have daughters of his own? Nieces? Shouldn't you graduate from this sorta sh*t around age 35?

            2) That said, I can't really pick on this guy for his age when 40 year old rappers seem obsessed with keeping pace with peers half their age. Patron Saint of all cRappers Jay-Z even had a "come to Jesus moment" and said (then retracted, which only made it worse) he'd stop referring to women as b*tches now that he's got a woman to raise. So, no, rappers don't have the greatest track record of acting their age. Does this mean point 1 isn't valid? No.

            3) Isn't this sorta pointless? Isn't the whole "stripping to pay tuition" (as opposed to "because I have Daddy Issues") thing already accepted as a cultural norm? If anyone should be offended, I think it would be exotic dancers.

            4) I won't go as far as to say "twerkin'" is ruining an entire generation of young girls, both black and white (I see ya' Miley), but it's damn sure making them look bad. And unemployable. Seriously, if you know of an underaged girl with a #TwerkTeam video on Youtube, please tell her parents to have that sh*t removed. No, it won't disappear from the internets forever, but damn, at least make it harder for potential employers to Google. Cause yeah, potential employers do look at this stuff.

            5) I suppose I'm supposed to make some grand point about Miley Cyrus now becoming the most famous twerker of all time, and how this makes her a cultural interloper along the lines of Elvis, Justin Timberlake, and Robin Thicke, and how that's an awful thing. Seriously, I ain't got the energy for all that. If the girl wants to twerk, let her twerk. She will be eating off Hannah Montana residuals for the next 50 years. There aren't exactly the same ramifications for her. And besides, it's twerkin', not jazz, not beebop, not rhythm & blues. It's just twerkin'. In the annals of "sh*t I'm perfectly fine with white people claiming", this ranks right up there with the word "bling", The Harlem Shake, and Wayne Brady. Take em' all. Please.

            As for my child, there shall be no twerkin'. Nor will my sons be PIMP Scholars[2]. They will all get into [insert your own prestigious college here] the old fashioned way: Good grades and racial quotas.

            Question: Would you allow your child to apply to be a "Twerk Scholar"? Other than a lame excuse to plug Juicy J's next album (#GrandHu$tle), is there anything more we should infer about this publicity stunt and what it says about the state of hip-hop?

            [1] The fact that she'll someday be gawked at by boys (and men) isn't lost on me at all. And yes, that sh*t keeps me up at night. And yes, I'm considering getting a gun. Just off GP. And no, that's not a joke.

            [2] This was the begining of the end for Nelly. Well, that country北京体彩网官方网站 music song prolly was, but this ain't exactly help.

            Monday, August 19, 2013

            The Absolute Worst Way To Pay Tribute To Trayvon Martin.

            In the months prior to the George Zimmerman trial, Hoodies were omnipresent. Especially online. Millions of people changed their social media avatars to an image of themselves, or Martin, or their kids, of their pets, or MLK (seriously, WTF?) wearing a hoodie. I never really got with this (okay, maybe the day prior to the verdict), because I thought there were far better ways to show solidarity with the Martin family. Namely: registering to vote, and showing my black ass up for jury duty when called. You could throw mentoring/tutoring/coaching kids in there if you're really bad ass. But hey, Drive-By Activism is a lot easier. Change that avatar!

            In the pantheon of "supportive social gestures", I thought wearing a hoodie was pretty lame. But whatever.

            This woman, though, well, she was really dedicated to the cause. So dedicated she quit her damn job. And .
            Last month, when a jury found Zimmerman not guilty in Martin’s death, it wasn’t the end of the story. People young and old, black and white, took to the streets from coast to coast. For Zimmerman, too, much was not resolved; whatever you may think of him, he can’t be happy that he killed a young man on the cusp of adulthood, with dreams and goals and loving parents who presented the most graceful bearing of grief I’ve ever seen.

            I needed to do something. The Monday after the trial ended, I went to my job at a small doctor’s office and made my computer desktop wallpaper (which was not viewable to the public) an image of a hoodie. This image had sprung up on the Internet and social media as an expression of support for the Martin family. It is meant as an acknowledgement that this senseless death had not gone unnoticed.


            Our president asked that we “do some soul-searching.” He let us know that he didn’t have much faith in politicians organizing conversations on race, but he said that he thought that in our families, churches and workplaces we might succeed.

            But that’s not what happened in my case. On Aug. 1, at the end of a long work day, my boss called me into his office. Apparently, during the two weeks since I had selected the hoodie image for my computer desktop, some of my co-workers had complained. They felt that this image, which could be seen only when I logged in or minimized all the windows open on my screen, was inappropriate. My boss, looking distressed, told me that I had to change it.

            There was no room for discussion between him and me or me and them. There would be no way to explain, to anyone who felt frightened or threatened by what I had done, that I wasn’t making some call to arms, or a black-power salute, or in fact trying to express any anger at all. It was merely an image of a piece of clothing worn by a young man who was wrongfully killed. By displaying it, I was simply saying that I was sad.


            So, I went to my computer and composed a letter of resignation. It would be the last document I would ever complete at my workplace of six years. It wasn’t easy, but it also wasn’t hard. Either way, the real problem remained. When everything was said and done, the life of a young man who should have made it 北京体彩网官方网站 safely that night still had been cut short.
            You'll need to read the whole thing to get the full effect. And no, I'm not stupid enough to believe that this incident is the only reason why this woman (Brenda Howard) quit her job. This was probably the tip of the iceberg for both Ms. Howard and her employer, the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. So no, I'm not buying that whole "I had to speak truth to power so I quit" bull. Miss me with that.

            Jokes aside, I'm wondering why this lady thought it was okay to use company property to make a halfhearted political statement. I didn't understand President Obama's call for people to discuss race in their workplace, because the workplace in an inherently apolitical institution by nature. Just as I wouldn't have wanted to see a colleague with an "I Stand With Zimmerman" screensaver, I understand why some might be offended by the image of the hoodie. And even if they weren't, customers could potentially be offended. The employer was well within his right to ask her to simply remove the image from his computer. And Ms. Howard was well within her right to quit the job, regardless of how silly/trivial the reason.[1]

            Good luck landing a new receptionist job, Ms. Howard. That said, your article is hovering around the magical 5,000 comment mark on The Post right now. I think you've got a bright future somewhere.

            Question: Did this woman make a grand social statement, or just quit her job for no damn reason? Have you ever made a social statement on the job? Is there any good way to discuss political/social/racial issues while at work?

            [1] Wouldn't "wearing a hoodie" to work have been a more impactful social statement, and one that would have been far harder for her employer to prevent?

            Tuesday, July 9, 2013

            Ashy Or Classy?!? The Most Ratchet 100 Year Old Woman Ever.

            True story: I once met a 114 year old woman.[1] A few years ago, I was visiting my Grandmother and she told us she wanted to go visit a woman she'd read about in the local newspaper who'd lived in 3 different centuries and was still tickin'. So we drove to the woman's town, my grandma stopped at a gas station and asked where the woman lived, we successfully located her house, and were greeted at the door by her granddaughter, who was elated to see three strangers at the door (my brother was with us) and invited us in to see the lady we'd driven an hour to find.

            The end result was nothing at all like this ghetto sh*t! somethin' like this.

            Sorry, I know some of ya'll are gonna say this is cute, but this sh*t is ratchet as f*ck. I guess this is would would happen if Miss Joseline somehow made it past age 40. It's not amusing. But maybe that's just me.

            This is very, very Ashy.

            Question: Ashy or Classy? Is a 100 year old woman entitled to talk about as many random d*cks as she likes, or does this lady need to be at Shady Knolls?!?

            [1] Completely true story, BTW. I was probably more amazed that this family just allowed as random assed folks to walk up in their 北京体彩网官方网站 more than anything else. The lady was surprisingly lucid for her age, and nothing like the one-time Cab Calloway jumpoff in the video above. It was pretty inspiring. This was several years ago, and last I heard she was still alive.

            Wednesday, June 26, 2013

            Rachel Jeantel: Worst. Witness. Ever.

            You saw it (or are seeing it live right now). It's a total trainwreck, and I can't stop watching it.

            Talk about it here.

            Question: Has Rachel Jeantel singlehandedly set George Zimmerman free?!?

            Does Paula Deen Deserve Another Chance?!? Of Course She Does.

            I didn't have much to say (here) about the whole Paula Deen N*gger-Gate Controversy when it broke last week. Honestly, I just don't have the energy to dedicate to this sorta trivial sh*t, not when my favorite team has the #3 overall pick in tomorrow night's NBA Draft. So yeah, I've been focused on more important sh*t.[1]

            Deen's story wasn't particularly note-worthy for any reason other than it broke in a slow news cycle. If a 60 something white woman from rural Southwest Georgia hadn't used the word nigger at some point in her life, that woulda actually been newsworthy. Deen is a product of her environment, no matter how far she might be (corporately) removed from that environment. Had she done what 99% of people would have otherwise done and lied while being deposed, we wouldn't know anything different about her, nor would we care. She does nothing of relevance to anyone's life. She doesn't pass legislation, teach our children how to read, or fight terrorists. She's just a woman who makes butter sandwiches on basic cable. Nothing more.

            Slavery themed restaurant idea (Seriously, WTH?) aside, what did Deen actually admit to doing wrong here? She used the word nigger in a conversation with her husband in the privacy of their own 北京体彩网官方网站, after having a black man hold a gun to her head while robbing the bank she worked at. I can't think of many other instances where describing someone as a nigger would be totally appropriate, but this just might be one of them. Not saying I agree, but I understand.

            Alas, cultural cues and general rules of political correctness dictate that Deen had to lose something for admitting the using the word n*gger. That's how it is, and I'm frankly glad that's the case. We can't just have people randomly going around spouting out racial epithets with reckless abandon. The world's just a little bit better (for me) when I don't have to deal with that sh*t everyday. So yeah, Paula needs to have a couple of seats and get lost for awhile. And while I gave her props for that hostage apology video she made last week, this shit right here was unacceptable. You aren't a victim. You're making $20M a year. Miss me with that bullshit.

            Fall on the f*ckin' sword and get lost already. Do not pass go, do not collect $200, just go sit down for a few months.

            But this being America and whatnot, she'll get another chance. And why shouldn't she? People have done far worse (ie: having golden shower sex with underaged girls, and taping it!) and rebounded. As long as you can make someone else a dollar, there will always be someone else willing to pay you a dime.

            See you in about 6 months, Mrs. Deen. In the meantime, here's the hoping The Food Network gives more time to The Neelys. #reparations

            Question: What's your read on this whole story? Is it overblown? Does Deen "deserve another chance"? Is she playing the victim role here?

            [1] BTW, I think Otto Porter is gonna be a far better pro than any of the "experts" are projecting. But I digress.

            Wednesday, May 29, 2013

            Michelle Bachmann's Weird, Yet Sorta Awesome "Retirement Video".

            , and taking a source of lots of good AB.com blog fodder with her.
            Minnesota Rep. Michele Bachmann, a tea party favorite, said Wednesday she will not run for another term in the U.S. House and said her decision had nothing to do with ongoing investigations over finances related to her unsuccessful run for the Republican presidential nomination.

            Bachmann also said in an early morning announcement, released in a video posted to her website, that her decision wasn't influenced by concern about a difficult re-election campaign in her suburban Minneapolis district.

            "My decision was not influenced by any concerns about my being re-elected," Bachmann said. She narrowly won a fourth term last year over Democrat Jim Graves, a hotel chain founder who is running again in 2014.

            Ron Carey, a former chief of staff to Bachmann and ex-state GOP chairman, said Bachmann anticipated a tough battle ahead and seemed to be stuck in place in Congress even if she survived.
            Here's the epic announcement video. BTW, when did people start retiring via video?!?

            This video is just... odd, for so many reasons.
            Bachmann's "dead behind the eyes" stare.

            Bachmann's robotic, intonation-absent voice, which makes this whole video seem like something dictated by Siri.

            Bachmann's soft-focus lense.

            That music, which sounds like the backdrop to a corporate quarterly earnings announcement.

            Bachmann's comical list of "achievements".
            I halfway expected her to say "now please turn off all electronic devices, and enjoy your flight" at the end. You know, sorta like this...[1]

            Bachmann listed plenty of reasons why she wasn't retiring, but failed to mention why she is. I've got a pretty good idea, and I'm fairly sure it rhymes with "money". Or somethin' like that. #chiching

            Question: Is this video just begging for an SNL spoof? Why is Bachmann really retiring?!?

            [1] , but the comedic value just isn't there.

            Thursday, May 9, 2013

            Meet The Next Charles Ramsey, Melinda Brown Duncan.

            Meme makers, Youtube Autotuners, exploitative t-shirt makers, and lovers of Ignorant Negros Local News Eyewitnesses worldwide, rejoice! That black guy might have put a shoe to his ex-wife and might not have actually rescued that white woman after all, but why let that ruin the party. Move over, Charles Ramsey, cause in the words of renowned urban poet O'Shea Jackson, "they'll have a new n*gga" next year."

            And by "next year", I mean "next news cycle". Meet , who is angry as hell at Barry Sanders being chosen as the Madden coverboy something or other, and lets a local reporter have an earful.

            Duncan starts trending in 5...4...3...2...

            Thursday, April 11, 2013

            Rand Paul Goes To Howard University. Lies His A$$ Off.

            Part of the GOP's Autopsy Report issued in the wake of their November 2012 thrashing noted that the party needed to "re-engage African American voters" by "going into their communities" to "explain how Conservative principles" can appeal to them. The party pledged to spend $10 Million dollars as part of this outreach effort.

            Of course, any black person with a working brain knows this "effort at engaging black voters" means one thing, and one thing only: giving more "street money" to black pastors in hopes of influencing votes. And quite honestly, I couldn't blame them. This tactic worked in 2004 when Bush used it to get black votes by pushing fear of gay marriage via the pulpit. And while nobody was paying attention, last Fall President Obama only won 93% of the black vote (down 2% from 2008) because the GOP played the exact same card. The party has no interest in addressing it's systematic problems that offend/hurt black voters. You know it, I know it, and so do they.

            All of this makes Rand Paul's decision to go to Howard University and deliver a speech on the merits of Conservatism somewhat puzzling. It wasn't an appearance "sanctioned" by the party, and given some of Paul's past statements, had the potential to end very, very badly.

            I'll save you all the trouble of watching the entire tape. Except for a few notable exchanges (and one really embarrassing audience question about Malcolm X's assassination, and another from a dude who appeared to be wearing a FUBU jersey... WTF, HU?!?) it's mostly boring, boilerplate "Party of Lincoln" crap you've already heard a million times. The kids were civil, and the thunderous applause is deceiving, given the fact that Paul obviously shipped in a bunch of his supporters, as seemingly all Conservatives do when speaking in front of "The Blacks".

            Paul does get called to the mat for his past statements about the Civil Rights Act, and wouldn't you know it, he made some "factual inaccuracies". The Washington Post's .
            Rand Paul, a potential GOP candidate for the 2016 presidential election, gave an interesting speech on Wednesday to historically black Howard University, but his remarks were overshadowed by his attempt to explain the controversy over his 2010 comments on the landmark Civil Rights Act of 1964.

            “I have never wavered in my support for civil rights and the Civil Rights Act,” he said in his speech. “The dispute, if there is one, has always been about how much of the remedy should come under federal or state or private purview.”

            But then Paul expanded on his remarks in the question-and-answer period, saying in response to a tough question that he had been concerned really only about the “ramifications and extensions” of the Civil Rights Act.

            The problem for Paul started when the Louisville Courier-Journal placed on its Web site an April 17, 2010, interview between Paul and the paper’s editorial board. Presumably that is the extended interview that Paul referenced. We have embedded the relevant section below and have highlighted the key sections.

            Then here’s what Paul said on MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow Show on May 20, in which he suggested he would have wanted to modify one section of the Civil Rights Act, one dealing with “private institutions.” However, his logic is a bit confusing because he appears to be referring to Title 2 — “public accommodations engaged in interstate commerce” — (such as hotels and restaurants) — but there is also Title 7, which prohibits discrimination in businesses of a certain size.

            Paul is rewriting history here. We don’t see anywhere in these interviews “an extended conversation about the ramifications beyond race,” at least in the way that Paul describes it at Howard University.

            Indeed, Paul claims he “never wavered” on the Civil Right Act but in the MSNBC interview he mused openly about possibly wanting to change one provision if he had been a senator. Ironically, the issue that troubled Paul was what Senate Republicans at the time had modified in order to deal with the very concerns that Paul raises almost five decades later.

            We were tempted to give this Four Pinocchios but some of his language at Howard appears to be a product of fuzzy thinking. Still, Paul does earn Three Pinocchios for trying to recast and essentially erase what he said in 2010. It would be better to own up to his mistake — if he now thinks it was one — rather than sugarcoat it.
            If there's anything I actually admire about Paul, it's his a ability to tell complete lies with a totally straight face, and spin his way into a suitable answer. This dude's gonna be a serious problem come the 2016 debates. He's really, really good at peddling bullsh*t.

            But more than anything else, this speech highlight's the party's biggest problem with engaging black voters: a total and utter amnesia about everything the party has done (ie: The Southern Strategy) to turn away those voters in droves since the mid-60's. Paul keeps harping on the fact that Democrats were the party of segregation, that Lincoln freed the slaves, and Booker T Washington was an ideological Conservative. But guess what? Black people care about what you're doing today, not 2 centuries ago.

            What have you done for us lately?

            Question: How, assuming they actually cared, could the GOP honestly engage black voters?!?